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J’ai eu la chance de voyager dans beaucoup de régions du monde et c’était intéressant de voir comment d’autres cultures traitent les conflits et les échanges quotidiens qui, au Canada, justifieraient des excuses immédiates. J’ai découvert que certaines cultures aiment argumenter. Chaque individu dit ce qu’il a à dire, souvent agressivement (de mon point de vue canadien), et quand les deux parties sont satisfaites, la dispute est terminée et chacun poursuit sa vie—aucune concession nécessaire. D’autres cultures préfèrent éviter le conflit en premier lieu, intériorisant les frustrations et vivant plus harmonieusement en société.

Mais, indéniablement, l’utilisation du mot « désolé » est absolument canadienne. En 2009, le Loi de 2009 sur la présentation d’excuses a été introduite en Ontario. En fait, aujourd’hui, neuf provinces canadiennes (sur dix) et deux territoires (sur trois) ont leurs propres lois sur les excuses. En Ontario, cette loi signifie, qu’aux yeux de la loi, dire que vous êtes désolé, ou une autre excuse similaire, est considéré comme « manifestation de sympathie ou de regret » et « n’emporte pas aveu exprès ou implicite de faute ou de responsabilité de sa part dans l’affaire. » En termes simples, cette loi protège les Canadiens qui s’excusent par réflexe d’être déclarés coupables simplement parce qu’ils ont dit qu’ils étaient désolés. Comme nous le savons, au Canada, « désolé » est un mot qui a plusieurs significations.

Pensez-vous que vous satisferez aux critères canadiens de présentation des excuses? Consultez ce quiz sur Buzzfeed (uniquement disponible en anglais) pour déterminer combien vous vous excusez inutilement.

Unapologetically Canadian

A major national stereotype for Canadians is that of our excessive politeness, and as far as stereotypes go, being known on a global scale as a friendly place is not a bad reputation to hold. One major manifestation of our national politeness is our notorious need to say “sorry”.

All the time. Everywhere. For every reason under the sun. Even when an apology is far from warranted: someone bumps into us? We say sorry. When asking someone for help, even though it’s their job to do so? We’re sorry. I have even apologized to cars having to stop for me to use a crosswalk, and you would not believe the number of virtual apologies you’d see if you search my email inbox. It seems to be this innate, knee-jerk type response for Canadians no matter the circumstances. Some argue that it is due to the malleability of the Canadian Identity, others chalk it up to social awkwardness, while some people see it as an admission of guilt.

I am fortunate to have been able to travel to many different parts of the world, and it has been interesting to see how other cultures handle daily conflicts and exchanges that, in Canada, would warrant an immediate apology. I have discovered that some cultures like to argue it out. Each party says their piece, often quite aggressively, and when both sides are satisfied, the argument has ended, and they each move on with their lives—no concession required. Other cultures prefer to avoid the conflict in the first place, internalizing frustrations and living more harmoniously in society.

But undeniably, the use of the word sorry is unapologetically Canadian. So much so, that in 2009 the Apology Act was introduced in Ontario. In fact, today, 9 Canadian provinces (of 10) and 2 territories (of 3) have their own apology laws. In Ontario, this means that in the eyes of the law, saying you are sorry, or any other similar-spirited apology, can only be considered “an expression of sympathy or regret”, and does not “constitute an express or implied admission of fault or liability by the person in question.” Simply put, this law protects Canadians who are reflex apologizers from being found guilty simply because they said they were sorry, as we all know, in Canada sorry is a word of many meanings.

Do you think you meet the Canadian criteria of apologizing? Check out this Buzzfeed quiz to determine how much you apologize unnecessarily.